I (49M) believe I have prostate cancer, have no money, no insurance, 2 kids and in the process of divorcing my wife of 25 years. I need help.

Hi everyone,

I’m 49 years old, and I’m worried I might have prostate or colon cancer.

In 2019, I noticed changes in my weight patterns despite consistent eating and exercising habits. I saw a doctor who found an enlarged prostate and mentioned my platelets were a bit off, but my PSA came back normal. I brought up cancer, but he didn’t think it was likely because of my age.

I wasn’t satisfied with his relaxed approach, so tried to get second opinions. I saw two additional doctors and I felt each time I was trying to express my concerns, that it fell on deaf ears. One doctor even yelled at me when I told her that I hadn't been gaining weight. She said "If I fed you 10k calories right now you would gain weight!" I was shocked and filed a complaint against her.

Any test that I wanted to do would get shot down by my wife. We are currently going through a divorce as I realized that she has been dealing with narcissism, and my health concerns were not important to her. Many times she made me feel ridiculous like I was being a hypochondriac, and always made me feel bad about any money I wanted to spend on tests.

We eventually found a low cost imaging place and I got an MRI of my pelvis in 2002. Instead of paying for a doctor to evaluate the imaging report, she decided to do it herself to save money, since she is a dentist. According to the report everything looked normal.

Fast forward to now: I’ve been feeling swelling in my pelvic area, noticing bruising on my legs, and just found a large polyp near my anal sphincter.

I’m very concerned that I’ve had cancer for years and it might have spread. Which is so frustrating because I tried so hard to catch it early. The problem is, I’m divorcing my wife (who mismanaged finances and the dental practice we ran together for over 12 years), and I’m currently broke, unemployed, and uninsured.

I have two teenage kids who depend on me, and I want to address this, but I don’t know where to start given my financial situation.

Does anyone have experience with local resources for people in my situation?

Can someone recommend a compassionate doctor that actually listens? I just want to survive to be there for my kids.

I feel lost.

Thank you for your help!