[Seinfeld Theme Plays]

[Screen fades into diner. Camera pans down to Nick and Jack sitting at a diner booth.]

Nick: So how’s the report coming along?

[Jack, reading the back of a sugar packet, looks up to Nick]

Jack: I should’ve been an architect.

Nick: What?

Jack: My life could’ve been different if I was an architect. People like architects.

Nick: People like architects?

Jack: Of course people like architects.

Nick: Do you know any architects?

Jack: Of course I know architects.

Nick: You don’t know any architects.

Jack: You think I’m incapable of knowing an architect?

Nick: Why would you even know an architect?

Jack: To discuss architecture with.

Nick: You discuss architecture, with architects, on a regular basis?

Jack: I lead a rich social life, which includes many an architect.

[Nick, leans back in his seat and makes a hand gesture to Jack]

Nick: Ok, name one.

[Laugh Track]

Jack: What?

Nick: Name an architect.

[Jack begins fiddling with the sugar packet in his hand]

Jack: Davinci.

[Laugh Track]

Nick: Davinci?

Jack: Yeah, Davinci architect-ed buildings.

Nick: What buildings did Davinci architect?

Jack: He did that leaning tower.

[Nick leans closer to Jack]

Nick: Let me get this straight, when you said you know architects, and I asked you to name one, you said, Davinci, who you claim is the architect of the leaning tower of Pisa?

[Jack puts the sugar packet down and puts his shoulders back.]

Jack: Yes.

[Nick grabs his coffee and goes back to his normal sitting position]

Nick: Well who could argue with that?

[Laugh Track]

[Nick takes a sip from his coffee]

Nick: How’s the report coming?

[Jack makes erratic hand motions]

Jack: You know, I don’t feel enough respect is being paid to all the responsibilities I carry.

Nick: Oh, really?

Jack: Yes, I have a lot on my plate, and nobody respects it.

Nick: Maybe you should delegate it then. Take the load off.

[Jack chuckles and gestures to himself]

Jack: As much as I would love to, Nick, and believe me, it is quite the burden. Everything would fall apart. I mean, could you imagine how the organization would run without me?

[Jack chuckles again, grabs his coffee and leans back in his seat]

Nick: It is hard to conceive...So you’re not going to do the report?

Jack: I’m doing the report. *scoffs* I do ALSO have a congregation that calls my attention from time to time.

Nick: Do they like you?

[Jack’s smile turns to a grimace]

Jack: They’re supposed to.

[The diner door swings open quickly and Cal bursts through. He sees where Jack and Nick are sitting and stumbles quickly towards the booth and sits next to Jack]

Cal: You’ll never believe what just happened!

Nick: What?

Cal: I got this new game Nick. It’s called Galgun. *His voice gets high pitched* You shoot Japanese high school girls with your Love Gun.

[Cal starts shaking with excitement. Laugh track.]

Jack: Cal, what did I tell you about hentai? It’s a sin.

[Cal looks bewildered at Jack]

Cal: No, no, no. The girls keep their clothes on, it’s very tasteful. Although, some of the guys online have been saying there’s ways to...get a little more action out of them.

[Cal winks at the group. Laugh Track]

Jack: What guys?

Nick: He’s been on 4-Chan recently.

Jack: Aren’t they degenerates?

Cal: You know, those guys get a bad rap. They actually tried hunting down a couple of pedophiles. Hey! You guys want to come over and play some?

Nick: You’re supposed to be approving the staff budget.

Cal: Ah! *He waves his hand, dismissively, at Nick* Just use last year’s.

Nick: What was last year's budget?

[Cal and Jack look at each other.]

Cal: 100?

Jack: No, it was closer to 300?

[Nick looks at both of them with disdain]

Nick: 300?

Jack: Probably 350-ish.

Nick: You guys are idiots.

[Laugh track, fade to black]